tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30518216991276471472024-03-12T22:55:01.380-07:00Hilary Allen's Lightning Process BlogHilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.comBlogger60125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-23181677162965378012020-08-30T09:07:00.004-07:002020-08-30T23:47:46.229-07:00You have a choice<p><span style="font-size: large;">When I first started looking into
doing the Lightning Process for myself, way back in 2008, one of the ideas that
really had an impact on me was that I had a choice. That I could change all
these things that previously I had no idea I had any influence over. My
emotions, old stuck beliefs that were getting in my way, but for me most of
all, my body and my health! I had had 8 years of fatigue and illness, not being
able to work or to do anything but the absolute basics of daily life. I had
tried SO many things (you wouldn’t believe some of the things I tried! But
that’s another story….), but nothing had made much difference, so I had got to
the stage of thinking “that’s just the way I am”.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span face="" style="font-size: medium; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Then an article I read about the
LP contained this simple line “You have a choice”. It said that there were
effective, proven tools I could learn which could switch off the ill health I
was stuck in, and switch back on the healthy state that had been there before I
got ill. That I could CHOOSE health! Not something we are taught in schools!</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span face="" style="font-size: medium; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">I hadn’t even learned those tools
yet but I noticed a sense of excitement and hope for the future that immediately
created happiness in the present, expectations of a more positive future, and
mysteriously (to me, then) a slight change in my energy levels already. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span face="" style="font-size: medium; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">When I actually did the Lightning
Process for myself, I learned much more about how this is possible, about the
science behind it, about how to access the neurology and physiology of health,
about the powerful connection between our mind and body; all of which enabled
me to choose balance and wellness.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span face="" style="font-size: medium; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">So that phrase has always stuck
with me. All these years later, I still often say to myself “You’ve got a
choice here, Hilary”. But also, my brain has taken it on board automatically
now, so it has become a core way in which I approach the world. Even in little
things, like the weather! Clearly, we don’t have a choice about the weather, so
when I say “You have a choice, Hilary”, my brain then searches for what I DO
have influence over, like how I feel about the weather, or taking waterproof
clothing!</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span face="" style="font-size: medium; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;">Try out this phrase for yourself
and see what effect it has. What different thoughts do you have? What changes
in your body? Does your future seem brighter? If you were to learn to have a
choice over all these things you never thought you could influence, what would
you choose?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span face="" style="font-size: medium; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span style="font-size: medium;">If you would like to find out more about how I can help you, please go to my website <a href="www.hilaryallen.org.uk " target="_blank">www.hilaryallen.org.uk </a>.</span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span style="font-size: medium; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;"><span style="font-size: medium; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-16190515583796245842020-05-22T09:04:00.001-07:002020-06-01T09:01:26.386-07:00Why catastrophe thinking is neither accurate nor a good idea<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">With everything that is going on in the world at
present, anxiety could feel like a natural, even inevitable, response. But
there is nothing inevitable about it; there is a key thinking pattern involved
in anxiety, often called catastrophe thinking, and there are simple ways to
learn to change it. Feeling anxious generally involves telling yourself a
horror story about your future ….. usually the worst possible outcome and then
some! Our brain goes something like this; if I focus on the worst thing that can
happen, I’ll be prepared for it, and if something better happens, I’ll feel
relieved and pleased. And if I keep repeating this, I will always be prepared.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">But there are several reasons why
that doesn’t work:</span></b><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<ul type="disc">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">None
of us know what will happen in the future.</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"> When we predict the
future it’s a guess, a story that we are telling ourselves. However, by
focusing only on the worst thing that could happen, our brain ends up
believing that this is the truth, not just one of many possibilities, so
you are not giving it accurate information.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">It’s
not even the most likely outcome. </span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Mostly you are choosing the possible or the
very unlikely, rather than the probable. 90% of what you worry about never
happens!<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">You
scare yourself</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">,
and turn on the fight or flight response. But since this story is about
the future, there is nothing to run from or fight. Instead, the chemicals
associated with the inappropriate fight or flight response just stop us
from thinking straight or making good clear decisions, stop our immune
system from working properly, and create all the symptoms of anxiety. And
if you repeat the same horror story time after time in your mind, you get
stuck in this state.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">It’s
the story that creates the anxiety, not the event.</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"> Human beings are
really good at problem solving. People are often surprised to find, when
something they fear actually happens, that they rise to the occasion and
find the inner resources to deal with it. They may even become stronger,
happier, and more resilient people as a result. We miss this ending out of
our horror stories!<o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ul>
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<b><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">What you can do to change this
pattern</span></b><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<b><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"><br /></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Start noticing the stories you are telling
yourself, recognise them as stories rather than the truth, and ask
yourself, <b>’Is it helping me to focus on this?’</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">If the answer is no, here are some ways to learn to
tell yourself more useful stories;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<ol start="1" type="1">
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Start
by remembering times in the past when <b>you successfully resolved a
challenging situation</b>. What did you do? How did that feel? Notice how
creative we can be in these situations.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Don’t
allow yourself to tell the same story more than once.</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"> Interrupt the
repetitive cycling round by insisting that you change it each time.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Deliberately
tell yourself as many<b> different stories</b> about what could
happen as you can. Use your creativity! Include ones where everything goes
really well, and ones with good and difficult things mixed together, to
balance your original “worst case” scenario.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Make
sure</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"> <b>every
story you tell has a successful outcome</b>, in which you rise to the
occasion, find the inner resources to handle it well, and move on to a
happy life. Go far into the future if you need to: ‘What will I feel like
in 10 years time?’ Psychologists talk about post traumatic growth; the
idea that difficult experiences can be a powerful positive impetus to move
forwards and grow.<o:p></o:p></span></li>
<li class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; color: #333333; line-height: normal; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo2; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; tab-stops: list 36.0pt;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">But
most of all, <b>keep coming back into the present.</b> Our
amazing ability to predict the future and problem solve can be very
useful, but it’s important to come back to the present and remember that
the future doesn’t actually exist! My favourite way of doing this is to
look at a tree:<o:p></o:p></span></li>
</ol>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoD16Z6C93CXs7TmDSPeKuhbPYUPyPM8O8xRCy_Uj5fVPqMGEIFqUfG_WJ4S4-Znum-hsk8hyphenhyphenI5U8gzVwmfFV7fYWyJdhkneeSlEy7HyWIKJ5MQjDAIHfNQHFHS9i-47qh35ZVup5Z6IpK/s1600/tree+picture+for+changing+stories.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoD16Z6C93CXs7TmDSPeKuhbPYUPyPM8O8xRCy_Uj5fVPqMGEIFqUfG_WJ4S4-Znum-hsk8hyphenhyphenI5U8gzVwmfFV7fYWyJdhkneeSlEy7HyWIKJ5MQjDAIHfNQHFHS9i-47qh35ZVup5Z6IpK/s320/tree+picture+for+changing+stories.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-68394299502817810142020-05-10T07:57:00.002-07:002020-05-10T07:58:46.191-07:00A Better Future is Possible<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">In Bristol a few days ago I saw a colourful banner that read "A better future is possible." </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Here is an inspiring children's story about how the dramatic events of the last months could lead to a much more positive future for the world. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The stories that we tell ourselves DO make a difference! What story are you telling yourself?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nw5KQMXDiM4">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nw5KQMXDiM4</a></span></span>Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-30715318826903182992020-02-14T03:04:00.000-08:002020-02-14T03:04:16.972-08:00What IS the Lightning Process?<br />
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I am often asked this question; and
it is surprisingly hard to answer, given that I have been a Lightning Process
practitioner for over 11 years! This is mainly because it is quite complex to
answer, and takes 3 days to explain properly. But over the years I have tried
lots of ways of giving a flavour of the LP, and I thought I would share a few
of them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The one line answer is ‘It’s a
training course that teaches you powerful tools, to enable you to influence
your health and life’. All human beings have amazing abilities, but often we
don’t even know we have these abilities, let alone how to use them to help
ourselves. The Lightning Process teaches you this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Using how your body works to make changes to your health<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">People’s next question, especially
when they want to influence their own physical health, is often “How on earth
can a training course help me to get well from a physical illness?” Good
question! I generally find the most effective way to answer is to explain a
little about how your body works.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">One of the amazing abilities that
your body has is the natural ability to heal. Think of how a cut heals, or your
body recovers from a cold. The LP shows you how to activate this innate natural
ability, and get it working well for you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Our brain and nerve pathways (in fact
our whole body) are constantly changing in response to how we use them. That’s <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">neuroplasticity</b>, and it’s behind all
learning. This means that you can learn to strengthen your healthy, happy
pathways, and allow stuff which is not useful to fade away. To find out more
you might like to look at my blog about sheeptracks and neuroplasticity.<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Then there is the powerful <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">fight or flight </b>response. This is only
meant to be turned on when there is a true physical emergency. But sometimes,
without meaning to, our body has learned to turn it on for situations where
running away or thumping someone is the last thing that is going to help! As a
result you can end up being stuck in the fight or flight response long term,
which takes a huge physical toll on your body. In the LP you learn to:<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Turn off the fight or flight response
if it is inappropriate<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">And the rest of the time keep your
healthy happy physiology switched on instead.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-90152623092789885552019-11-14T09:06:00.000-08:002019-11-14T09:07:45.880-08:00Is it a threat or a challenge?<br />
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<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">Have you ever missed the last bus or
train home? You might have felt panicky, scared and flustered, telling yourself
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>‘everything’s gone wrong’: or, you might
have calmly started to think through possible solutions. Or, has your boss /
teacher ever told you that you need to do a presentation to lots of people –
tomorrow! Did you immediately start to run around like a headless chicken? Or
did you decide you’d do your best and it’d be good enough? We are faced every
day with events that we need to respond to, and choices about how to respond.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">Is stress good for us?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">Clients often ask me ‘Isn’t a bit of
stress good for us?’ or ‘Don’t we need some adrenaline to get us going? I’d
never get anything done otherwise’. And it’s true that a state of deep
relaxation and calm – while lovely to experience – is not going to be the best
state to be in when responding to situations like these. But what do we
actually mean when we talk about stress or adrenaline? There is a lot of
confusion that goes on here, because there are actually TWO states involved.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">What many people refer to as ‘stress’
is that state where you feel <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">threatened</b>
by a situation: the result is often feeling rushed, snappy, not able to think
straight, not sleeping … Sound familiar? Ironically, being in this state does
nothing to help us resolve a problem or be at our best!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">But there is another much more useful
option, a <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">motivated ‘rising to the
challenge’</b> state. And this is the one that enhances our performance, and enables
us to think clearly and problem solve. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">The key to which state we are in
seems to lie in how we THINK about the situation, whether we see it as a threat
or a challenge. This makes all the difference to how we respond and the results
we achieve, but interestingly it <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">also</i>
makes a difference to what goes on in the cells of our body. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">So how do we know whether we are in
the challenge state or the threat state? Here are a few pointers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">The threat state involves:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">Focusing on the negative.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">Imagining and fearing the worst that
could happen.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">Feeling like you can’t do anything
about it.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">This actually means that your
performance gets worse just when you want to be at your best.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">The challenge state involves:<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">Believing you will be able to find a
way through.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">Being curious: ‘How will I resolve
this?’.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">Then looking for solutions and
opportunities, focusing on what you want.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "symbol"; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">You have calm energy, focus and concentration,
so you are at your best.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">The science bit<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">Interestingly (if you like science!)
there is some new scientific evidence to show that your body produces different
hormones depending on whether you think there is a challenge or a threat. In
both, your heart rate increases, but in the challenge state adrenaline is
produced, which expands your blood vessels to accommodate the extra blood; so
your blood pressure does not go up. When you think you are being threatened,
this sends different messages to your body, cortisol is the main hormone
produced, and adrenaline production is actually inhibited. Without the adrenaline
your blood vessels do not expand, and your blood pressure rises. Cortisol (the
‘stress hormone’) is known to be involved in a range of health problems,
especially when it is around long term.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large; line-height: 115%;">All of this is your body responding
to what <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you think</i> about what happens
to you!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-58018640476060126642019-09-30T07:57:00.003-07:002019-09-30T08:00:21.005-07:00Learning to be kind to yourself<br />
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">We are often told to “Be kind to
yourself” or “Love yourself”, but this can feel harder to do than to say. A
client asked me recently “What does it MEAN to be kind to yourself? I try, but either
I don’t know what to say, or I don’t believe what I say”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">This simple exercise had a
transformative effect for her, so you might want to see what changes for you as
you do it:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Think of someone who has been kind,
supportive or loving to you in the past. Step into their shoes, and imagine you
are them. How does it feel to see yourself through their eyes? What do they
feel or know about you? What would they say to you, and how would they sound as
they said it? How much do they know that you deserve this support? As your
supporter, feel what it feels like to feel this compassion, love, acceptance
and kindness towards you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Then step back into yourself and hear
what they have just said. Let it in, both what they said and HOW they said it (the
non verbal communication which makes all the difference). How does that feel
different from usual? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Another way of experiencing kindness
and support is to imagine how you would talk to a friend or family member, and
talk to yourself in the same way. So you can try this too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">What would it be like if we all
treated ourselves like kind and supportive people treat us – or, as we treat
other people? I would love to hear what <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">you</i>
learned about kindness from this exercise.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: medium;">"Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive." Dalai Lama</span></span></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-18745617787643674402019-07-23T07:35:00.001-07:002019-07-23T07:35:10.478-07:00Enjoying the whole walk<br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="_GoBack"></a><span style="font-size: 12pt;">I love climbing hills and mountains.
I love the fresh air, and the views which change every time I pause for breath
and look around. I also love the feeling of moving and stretching my body, and
even that great feeling when I take my boots off afterwards! I do it for fun.
The view from the top can be wonderful, but it’s a small part of the experience
and it’s the whole thing I enjoy.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But it is equally possible to treat
climbing a mountain as hard work, by focusing on the effort required, or forgetting
about the experience of climbing and fixing solely on the goal of getting to
the top. Why would we do it like that?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It is so easy to approach life like a
series of goals to be achieved. A list to be ticked off. If we have things that
we want to change in our lives we can end up approaching our self-help tools
like that too. Like a summit to be reached rather than a walk to be enjoyed.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The trouble with fixing on the summit
is that we are only there for 5 minutes. Sometimes we don’t even enjoy that
because we are focused on getting to the end of the walk – usually a road,
pretty uninteresting! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It is always our choice where we look
for joy, and if we look for it in the whole experience we will find a lot more
of it than if we focus solely on the end result. I clearly remember the
impression it made on me when someone reminded me that the end result of life
is actually death!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What would it be like to approach the
changes that we want to make in our lives like a fun walk, and to really enjoy
the whole experience; the ups and the downs, and the views along the way?<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Don’t do anything that isn’t play.” Marshall B Rosenberg, Non Violent
Communication<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></i></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiinwrjYgV6ffpK-IPNVypsEqnuPTM5JQNiFOWzvpR-3rvGVgJTV0BUSzY61QJGXh8LiYRXSjSzfpMbvSJ6vBw3gZWW92-kDrhZD-XWf2PRHqnkU8jBKRXHmi6MYlFaIBml63V5fa-0YV4P/s1600/mountain+.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiinwrjYgV6ffpK-IPNVypsEqnuPTM5JQNiFOWzvpR-3rvGVgJTV0BUSzY61QJGXh8LiYRXSjSzfpMbvSJ6vBw3gZWW92-kDrhZD-XWf2PRHqnkU8jBKRXHmi6MYlFaIBml63V5fa-0YV4P/s320/mountain+.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></i></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-42478578495723406032019-05-26T09:26:00.000-07:002019-05-26T09:27:09.092-07:00Fatigue to 18 mile coastal walk!<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Jess describes her experience before and after the Lighting Process:</span><br />
<br />
<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dyZ2I1z16EBtOd692ZplK7XPti_M2vzZTokvFumuZunHEGWOoG-M-2z7B2PSKdsCpw46Cc-wpGruRJQHYyTdw' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-86119989872176784142019-04-26T08:05:00.001-07:002019-04-26T08:05:29.870-07:00What happens when you doubt yourself<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">A client sent me this cartoon, which reminded me how much self doubt can get in our way:</span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3HdA4dyiH3b1fqPkbP8UiSi7AY-j_s-0hU7Y9mo3fQSM_5ADKC1MWaQZcEQnaPIYz59RYq-B7VUcdP0P5Z02h6bH7PlLOuuAFfgWJPsvgVhKbJ-Ozam7Zbwh3alFQd9GaP-bpjfUhnN1g/s1600/Rolling+stone+up+hill.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="749" data-original-width="750" height="319" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3HdA4dyiH3b1fqPkbP8UiSi7AY-j_s-0hU7Y9mo3fQSM_5ADKC1MWaQZcEQnaPIYz59RYq-B7VUcdP0P5Z02h6bH7PlLOuuAFfgWJPsvgVhKbJ-Ozam7Zbwh3alFQd9GaP-bpjfUhnN1g/s320/Rolling+stone+up+hill.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-79633479192596478642019-03-22T10:36:00.001-07:002019-03-22T10:36:48.024-07:00Sheep tracks and neuroplasticity<br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In NLP and the Lightning Process we
talk a lot about how our brains and bodies works. It’s interesting that the
inner processes that get us into trouble, are often also exactly what we need
to get us back on track, living our lives well. One of these is the brain’s
ability to change in response to how we use it. This is technically known as
“neuroplasticity”.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My clients know that I often tell
this story about sheep tracks as a way of describing neuroplasticity. Maybe it’s
because I so enjoyed my chances to work with sheep on farms in my early 20s!
Then one of my Lightning Process clients who is a farmer, Maria Greaves, sent
me this photo which reminded her of my story. So I promised I would write a
blog about it. Thanks Maria, I have finally written it!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1fOVDlRdYHDS80xU7edwi2qv86kgw8dzAx4vuLvpq_916zpflrLeEPxHbMOSgYfVcyoqf0HXz5mYxawkiJ1eKhe7LKairzB_sLs0dNt8ebtrC8SLnMUNRfoxC0Ju6ITDaLRohmJCJ1_W5/s1600/Sheep+tracks+picture.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1fOVDlRdYHDS80xU7edwi2qv86kgw8dzAx4vuLvpq_916zpflrLeEPxHbMOSgYfVcyoqf0HXz5mYxawkiJ1eKhe7LKairzB_sLs0dNt8ebtrC8SLnMUNRfoxC0Ju6ITDaLRohmJCJ1_W5/s320/Sheep+tracks+picture.jpeg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sheep tracks<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you are feeding sheep in a field
every day, you might find that the path and the feeding place become muddy and
churned up. So you decide to put up a fence to stop the sheep from going onto
the muddy area, and feed them somewhere drier and more suitable instead. To
begin with, the sheep won’t know where to go to find their food, but sheep are
pretty clever when it comes to food and they will work it out pretty quickly!
But there won’t be a track yet going to that new place, so to begin with they
will be pushing their way through grass and heather. However, when you
consistently give them food in this new place, it won’t take many days before
there is a clear sheep track that goes there. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And the old muddy track? When it is
no longer used it is surprising how quickly the grass will grow and the track
will naturally disappear. Just as the mud of Glastonbury Festival returns to
grassy fields again every year!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Neuroplasticity<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Our brains work in just the same way.
Our nerve cells connect with each other to form neural pathways, and when we
use a pathway it gets stronger, easier to go down, and more automatic. But when
we stop going down those pathways they fade away. Your body doesn’t like
anything to be wasted, so the materials are reused to build new pathways. (You
can see new neural pathways growing in brain scans.) So you can retrain your
brain as quickly and easily as those sheep tracks change, by “feeding your
sheep” where you want them to go. </span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-47096341648866953572018-12-01T09:44:00.001-08:002018-12-01T09:44:15.451-08:00Our blueprint for health and happiness<br />
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I saw my osteopath recently, and we
talked about the osteopathic idea that there is a blueprint for life in our
bodies; that we are all born with the ability to be healthy and happy. This includes
the ability to restore the balance when it goes out of kilter. Things get in
the way of that knowledge, but underneath our body know how exactly how to do
it. We just need to learn how to remind our body of what it already knows! This
is an idea that also underlies the Lightning Process (because Phil Parker first
trained as an osteopath). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I have started to play with this idea
of a blueprint in my imagination, knowing the power of our thoughts to
influence our bodies. I imagine myself getting very small and travelling into
my body, carrying this “blueprint for life” (like a map or plan for health and
happiness). In my imagination I go to each cell in my body and give it the blueprint,
then watch as it remembers what its role is in the big plan, and transforms. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Here I get very creative! Sometimes I
imagine that for each cell it is as if the sun has come out and it is relaxing
into the warmth, glowing with calm energy. I see the cell communicating well
with other cells in the body, all working together to create health and
happiness. Sometimes I choose specific cells: for example, I might want to
bring calm to any cells involved in the fight or flight response, if there is
no real emergency going on; or pour energy into cells that need that. It is all
about coming back into balance, which our body has a natural ability to do. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Sometimes I see the genes on the
chromosomes in each cell switching on or off so that they can respond in a
healthy way (the science of epigenetics has proved that this happens). Anything
that needs repairing gets repaired. A housekeeping team goes through and
decides what needs clearing out (toxins, dead cells, cells with mistakes that
don’t fit the blueprint, viruses…..) and takes them off to be composted and
transformed into something useful. My imaginary story changes every time.<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLOXKQlBK4Z8ZlhVO-aOUb97iAen4HMaOoUKsmCWpjhd2Kvk3kSFVmrDbJpK9RKxr-qTsy1PJXjZUONFQ2Bajyo0OiKF0-h7MBG9DL6UKnWFUBBFkdRyigZxHubmzn0jLpsjJK3zy1uhmh/s1600/compost+bin.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLOXKQlBK4Z8ZlhVO-aOUb97iAen4HMaOoUKsmCWpjhd2Kvk3kSFVmrDbJpK9RKxr-qTsy1PJXjZUONFQ2Bajyo0OiKF0-h7MBG9DL6UKnWFUBBFkdRyigZxHubmzn0jLpsjJK3zy1uhmh/s200/compost+bin.JPG" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My compost bin!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">If you decide to have a go yourself, have
fun with it! Remember there is a lot of evidence that our body responds to every
thought we think. If we think about lunch our stomach rumbles. And our brain
lights up in the same way on a scan whether we are looking at an apple, or
imagining an apple. So your body will be responding to these imaginary thoughts
too. We do housework in our homes and repair things that have gone wrong, why
not do the same for our bodies? And it’s a good way to take a break, or something
to do while you are drifting off to sleep …..<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">If you are curious and want more
information about using the power of your thoughts, I recommend David
Hamilton’s work, especially his book “How your mind can heal your body”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-68430830212707728182018-07-07T08:19:00.004-07:002018-07-07T08:20:24.767-07:00Being good enough<br />
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Do you
recognise this set of events? </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->You write a long list of things to do in your
day,</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Postpone things you enjoy or really want to do
for yourself, because you haven’t finished your list,</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Beat yourself up at the end of the day for not
getting it all done,</div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4.<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->And feel overwhelmed.</div>
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<br /></div>
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This is a
sign of perfectionism. A common misunderstanding about perfectionism is that it
is about doing things really well; which sounds like quite a good thing to aim
for, doesn’t it? However, it is actually about setting yourself an impossible
target, and then beating yourself up when you don’t achieve it. It tends to
have one of two results: you end up pushing and exhausting yourself trying to
achieve the impossible, or you don’t even begin to do something, because it all
looks too overwhelming. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Perfectionist
patterns vary from person to person: for example trying to be the perfect
parent, trying to meet everyone else’s needs and requests (now THAT’S an
impossible task to set yourself!), wanting everything you write to be perfect. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Society
encourages this pattern. What is expected of you at work can be completely
unrealistic. Schools reward getting things right, and working hard. Social media
gives the impression that you need to have the “perfect” life or body. Interestingly,
I reckon that about 70-80% of clients that come to see me run this pattern
somewhere in their lives, which shows how common it is.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
But what
gets lost in all of this? <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">You!</b> The
things you love doing, space and time for yourself, living your life fully, and
enjoying the present moment. So to make room for these vitally important
things, you need to get really good at:</div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Knowing what is really important in your life
and prioritising that.</div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Being kind to yourself.</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->Making mistakes and that being OK (after all, do
we really like it if our friends are perfect?!).</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: "symbol"; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]-->And being <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">good
enough</b>.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I know about
this because I used to have plenty of perfectionist patterns. I have made huge
changes with these since I did the Lightning Process, but from time to time I
still notice and change unrealistic expectations that I have of myself, other
people, and the world. The other week I was enjoying a walk on my own and
having a chat with myself (as I like to do from time to time!) and I started
playing round with putting “good enough” after anything that crossed my mind.
For example;</div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“My life is good enough”</div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“The world is good enough”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“My family and friends are good
enough”</div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>“My body is good enough”</div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>And, of course, most
importantly, “<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I</i></b> am good enough!”</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I felt quite
different about all sorts of things as I did this. And it must have had a powerful
effect, because that night I woke up with a poem in my head (not something that
has ever happened to me before!):</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Nowhere to go, </div>
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Nothing to do,</div>
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I’m good enough</div>
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And the world is too.</div>
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<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimFKD0MHpy-ZkYjXAG-fvgcMTagK1796IyqBlrcQZ5lNgJUCKi56Qd4dGq8e-beIz4t_HnS2n-d7j1aSBM8Ii0HWaV9UKv-ZS35qtuX8DNMnNQfDaXgk8Fdx1TpLW-oZpI9hQCKmU3bu1b/s1600/Tree.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimFKD0MHpy-ZkYjXAG-fvgcMTagK1796IyqBlrcQZ5lNgJUCKi56Qd4dGq8e-beIz4t_HnS2n-d7j1aSBM8Ii0HWaV9UKv-ZS35qtuX8DNMnNQfDaXgk8Fdx1TpLW-oZpI9hQCKmU3bu1b/s320/Tree.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></div>
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-89678176653407637022018-04-06T09:24:00.002-07:002018-04-06T09:25:56.888-07:00The science behind ME / Chronic Fatigue Syndrome<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Ever wondered how it is possible for the body to get stuck in a long term illness such as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome or ME? Here is an infographic from Phil Parker which explains some of the science which lies behind this. Similar things happen with a range of other physical illnesses.</span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5MKN7quvXOTMGR5b83IDKGMOrcVa1LJEwCa45uiZjbgQyoLQQ1zVwqtguIv11TjBIDJhzylp7n2b7VqJjEyiZnZb9g1Jkm2xq7Bcvvt07bTX6L4F6WbnOcgGRJoJDUZBq2prOPzbcAhi3/s1600/infographic+on+me.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5MKN7quvXOTMGR5b83IDKGMOrcVa1LJEwCa45uiZjbgQyoLQQ1zVwqtguIv11TjBIDJhzylp7n2b7VqJjEyiZnZb9g1Jkm2xq7Bcvvt07bTX6L4F6WbnOcgGRJoJDUZBq2prOPzbcAhi3/s640/infographic+on+me.jpg" width="480" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-33641361766653519832018-03-10T09:08:00.003-08:002018-03-10T09:08:56.777-08:00How to live life the easy way<br />
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">There is an easy way and a hard way
to live life; and interestingly, the difference between these two has surprisingly
little to do with external circumstances.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">So often we assume that we need to
change the external situation to be happy. We think “If only I had a better
job, different government, more sun….. THEN I would be happy” If being happy
involves changing the government, our job, other people, or the weather, we are
setting ourselves some very big obstacles to getting there! And then one of two
things tends to happen. We either put loads of energy into trying to change
something that is very difficult to change; or, we give up and assume we can
never be happy. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">The key to living life the
easy way is to identify what it is we can change, and what we can’t. And then
direct our energy into the things we CAN change.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">When you want something to be
different in your life, try asking yourself: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">“Can I actually change this?”
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">If not, “What DO I have
influence over?” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Generally we have most
influence over ourselves, our choices and actions, and our state of mind. We
have very little influence over other people, and trying to change other people
tends not to work out too well! And as our influence over the government, world
events etc tends to be small, we will get further in changing things if we
focus on what WE can do rather than worrying about what others are not doing. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">You might think you don’t
have influence over your state of mind, but you do! Here are two simple ways of
discovering this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Move,
do some exercise, go for a walk, do something fun; and check out how
differently you feel afterwards.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">Think
about someone you are fed up with, and look for 3 good things about them. How
does that change how you feel about them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="background: white; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;">There are many things in life
we have no control over, but we ALWAYS have control over how we respond to
them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-17046964745190360272018-03-09T10:04:00.002-08:002018-03-09T10:05:11.075-08:00Insights into changing pain<span style="font-size: large;">There is a revolution going on in our understanding of how chronic pain works, and therefore how we can retrain our brains to resolve it. In this video Professor Lorimer Moseley gives us fascinating insights into this breakthrough.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oji2mfcjisk</span>Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-87828482810482399062018-03-09T09:35:00.000-08:002018-03-09T10:05:24.031-08:00What you focus on matters<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This video and article both show how choosing what we focus on helps us to shape our lives.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCnfAzAIhVw Reticular Activating System</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">http://www.heysigmund.com/why-what-you-focus-on-is-what-becomes-powerful-why-your-thoughts-and-feelings-matter/</span><br />
<br />
<br />Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-52941067385695993292017-11-21T07:37:00.001-08:002017-11-21T07:38:04.447-08:00What is REALLY important?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhRkUwDBAmnfUPx-PqBW1Nj2KylYXfJJf2Uk6Tl5oChiLeYxclE-C0Fpnp5kHbHS3Ww_SWhMxo0-95ZGPb3ZafguFXZuQFgVPeA_ezymd-rbDomzodDCm9nnAVsaIoz2O90xKOBJ37IWeU/s1600/P1020809.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhRkUwDBAmnfUPx-PqBW1Nj2KylYXfJJf2Uk6Tl5oChiLeYxclE-C0Fpnp5kHbHS3Ww_SWhMxo0-95ZGPb3ZafguFXZuQFgVPeA_ezymd-rbDomzodDCm9nnAVsaIoz2O90xKOBJ37IWeU/s320/P1020809.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #181818; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Recently I heard the story of ‘<i>The Velveteen Rabbit’ </i>by Margery Williams Bianco for the first
time, and it got me thinking about what is REALLY important in life. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #181818; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Two toys in a nursery are having a conversation. The Skin
Horse, who ‘had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so
old that his brown coat was bald in patches and showed the seams underneath.’ And
the Velveteen Rabbit, a newcomer to the nursery. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #181818; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background: white; color: #181818;">"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one
day... The Skin Horse replies,</span><span style="color: #181818; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><br />
<span style="background: white;">"Real ... is a thing that happens to you.
When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY
loves you, then you become Real." </span><br />
<br />
<span style="background: white;">"Does it hurt?" asked the
Rabbit. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="background: white;">"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for
he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being
hurt." </span><br />
<br />
<span style="background: white;">"Does it happen all at once, like being
wound up," the Rabbit asked, "or bit by bit?" </span><br />
<br />
<span style="background: white;">"It doesn't happen all at once," said
the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time .... Generally, by the
time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out
and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter
at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't
understand.” <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="background: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #181818; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We often fail to notice some of the most important things in
life, like the connections and love we have with people, because we spend so
much time thinking about stuff like how we look, or what people think of us.
This is when it is worth asking “What is REALLY important here?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #181818; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I also thought about the fact that this is what this story is
saying to <i>me, today</i>, but the last time
I heard it I took a slightly different meaning from it. Stories are very
powerful, partly because they mean whatever we need them to mean to help us at
the time. What you take from this story might be very different from what I
take from it, but just right for you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 115%;">By the way, the picture is of my
niece’s much loved rabbit, which went everywhere with her for many years!</span><span style="background: white; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-32674834291408459542017-07-22T09:20:00.001-07:002017-07-22T09:21:50.834-07:00Tips for getting things done<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 0cm; text-autospace: ideograph-numeric;">
<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I
used to be a great procrastinator, saying things to myself like “I really
SHOULD write that email / go swimming / sort out those boxes”! However, I have
learned lots about how easy it can be to get motivated, once you know how.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;">So
often we unconsciously use ways to try and motivate ourselves that simply don’t
work. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;">Do
any of these sound familiar?<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"><i>* Scaring
yourself with what will happen if you don't
do it:</i> eg "I will be fat and unhealthy if I don't
exercise". It means you tend to experience lots of stress
and bad feelings. Also, you don't spend much time thinking about what you <i>do</i>
want in life so you may not have very clear goals.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;">It
is a good idea to add in what you do want.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"><i>* Being a Dictator:</i></span><span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"> eg giving yourself
orders (in your head) in a stern, unpleasant voice, or saying "have
to" or ‘should’. Most people react by putting things off! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;">Instead
you can use a pleasant, inviting voice to say things like "It will be nice
/ useful to ... " or "I really want to ..."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"><i>* Imagining what it will be like to do something</i></span><span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"><i>,
instead of seeing it finished.</i> This works well if what you are doing is fun, but
not so well if it is something like washing up. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: large; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;">What
happens when you think instead about what it will be like when the washing up
is all done? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"><i>* Overwhelming yourself:</i></span><span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-bidi-language: #00FF;"> eg. "To paint
the spare room I’ll have to clear everything out and I don’t know where to put
everything and then I’ll have to buy the paint and then…. " It all seems
too big and we tend to put off starting. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="color: #000209; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">You
can break it down by asking yourself "What is the first step?" If
that is still too big, break that down too! Then notice and enjoy each little
step you complete, so you are motivated to do the next one.</span>Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-51930472061584808552017-07-21T10:43:00.001-07:002017-07-21T10:44:03.395-07:00Lightning Process embroidery!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitLuA57IZaE35E9COC7JLjt7_OVTZCc_tyAf4uer84CW7Dmv7zvQduwoC1GxELr98lPAHWlh_iX8weRKdUfEZs0v2-sitMHqJWVW4SBamCgZD5cReeem1kxA2TAxw0i8t35nq8fiLNBNzc/s1600/Duck.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitLuA57IZaE35E9COC7JLjt7_OVTZCc_tyAf4uer84CW7Dmv7zvQduwoC1GxELr98lPAHWlh_iX8weRKdUfEZs0v2-sitMHqJWVW4SBamCgZD5cReeem1kxA2TAxw0i8t35nq8fiLNBNzc/s320/Duck.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I was delighted and touched to receive this beautiful gift from a recent happy (and very skilled) Lightning Process client, Nilu Ahmed. In case you are wondering, the duck represents our natural ability to float and be buoyant in life (in both body and mind): we were born with it, we can re-find it within us. Thanks Nilu!</span></div>
Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-57840409916398912032017-07-21T10:41:00.002-07:002017-07-21T10:41:53.113-07:00Martine McCutcheon talks about the Lightning Process<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Here is an article about actress and singer Martine McCutcheon's experience of the Lightning Process.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">http://home.bt.com/lifestyle/health/wellness/what-is-the-lightning-process-11364193609824</span>Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-77048171141247109842017-05-30T08:06:00.000-07:002017-05-30T08:08:49.432-07:00“300 days after the Lightning Process I climbed Snowdon!”<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">This was the heading one of my clients sent me
recently. She did the Lightning Process course for fibromyalgia, and
transformed the chronic pain that she used to experience.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">She continued;<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">“That’s not just climbing Snowdon, that’s
climbing with a smile! I really enjoyed it. I felt strong and healthy and
amazing.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Proof LP works if you work really hard. So
many things have changed, and I’ve changed so many things, and I feel great for
it. Looking forward to my next 300 days.”<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Gemma<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Isn’t it amazing that something as real and
physical as chronic pain can be changed? Yet pain consultants and researchers
now know that most of what we used to think about pain is wrong. They have
produced this fun and interesting 5 minute video for clients, which shows how
much of an overlap there now is between the medical profession’s understanding
of chronic pain and what the Lightning Process does.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_3phB93rvI">Understanding pain in less than 5 minutes, and what to do about it.</a></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">As I say a little bit more about the “p” word,
I am going to call it “sensation” instead. This is because our brain
understands words one at a time, by imagining what each word means and then
releasing chemical messages in response: so if I use a word a lot of times,
that is a lot of possibly unhelpful messages about that subject whizzing round
your body! Also, the majority of what I say applies equally well to other
unhelpful sensations the body experiences, like tinnitus and vertigo.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The video explains that all sensation
is experienced in the brain, and that beyond 3 – 6 months, any tissue damage
has healed as far as it can be. Sensation’s purpose is to communicate – warn –
so as to protect cells from damage, so long term sensation stops serving its
original protective purpose. It has become more about the over-sensitivity of
the nervous system. Sensation signals are being sent when there is no need for
them. Our brain is trying to help us, but sometimes it gets it wrong. “To
change it, you need to retrain the brain and the nervous system.”<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And
retraining the brain and nervous system is exactly what the Lightning Process
is so good at helping you to do. This 2 minute video by Phil Parker about
neuroplasticity and sensation shows this very simply. Neuroplasticity, by the
way, is the way in which the brain changes in response to how it is used.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?annotation_id=annotation_741816&feature=iv&src_vid=84rP844SssY&v=tJ93qXXYRpU">Neuroplasticity made simple</a></span></span></div>
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Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-46828909785149379822017-05-08T00:47:00.003-07:002017-05-08T00:47:49.175-07:00Learning to go automatic<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">I
was staying in a friend’s house for a few weeks recently (getting away from
builders!) and I noticed how, for the first couple of days, I had to really
think about lots of things I normally do automatically: like reaching to the
right cupboard for teabags. I realised again how much of our lives are run on
automatic pilot, and how brilliant our brain is at putting things into
automatic mode. This is great news for our ability to learn to be healthy and
happy automatically.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 115%;">Our
brain does this because, research shows, our conscious mind can only focus on
about 7 things at once. Ever tried to remember your shopping list if you have
forgotten to take it to the shop? You might remember it all if there are only 5
things, less likely if there are 20! So our brain is very keen to put things
into autopilot, because your unconscious mind can handle far far more than your
conscious mind. Your automatic (unconscious) brain deals with things when you
are not consciously focused on them: like breathing, driving or walking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 115%;">It
is amazing how quickly you can learn to do something automatically. By the time
I had been in that house 3 days, I had acquired hundreds of new automatic
patterns, and my body knew where the teabags, sink and kettle were without
needing to involve my conscious brain at all!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 115%;">My
mind and body learned these new automatic patterns because it made sense and
seemed a helpful thing to learn. In the same way, when we decide to learn new
ways to be healthy and happy, after a little bit of practise our brain gets the
idea and carries on with them on autopilot. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-31001971467874962382017-02-19T05:24:00.001-08:002017-02-19T05:24:21.007-08:00Get creative about what you want<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When I ask people what they want in
their lives, so often they say “But I don’t KNOW what I want!”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is sometimes because we don’t
realise that there are two stages to finding out what we want. First we need to
access our creative, imaginative brain, and allow ourselves to explore
possibilities and ideas. Then, AFTER we have done that, we bring in our
logical, analytical brain and refine it, decide what is practical, plan, and
problem solve.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Mostly when we are having difficulty
with knowing what our goals are and achieving them, one of these stages is
being missed out or not working properly.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For many people it is the creative,
imaginative stage that gets missed out. When we ask ourselves “What would I
love to do?”, immediately thoughts like these come up: <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">“That
won’t work because....”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">“You’ll
never be able to do that.........”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">“That
sounds like it will take too much hard work / money”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">“I
haven’t got the skills........”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">“Yes
but.........”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="line-height: 115%;">“I
can’t....” <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Doing this is a bit like if you
planted an acorn, then, as soon as a green shoot poked above the soil, you
pulled it out because it didn’t look like an oak tree! Being reasonable and
practical is a valuable skill, but it is only half the story.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Creativity and imagination are
abilities we were all born with: just watch and listen to any small child
playing! These abilities will still be within you, whether or not you feel like
they are, and with a little bit of practise and uncovering you can remind
yourself of them. I recommend this exercise:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Give yourself a set amount of time,
an hour, a day, even 10 minutes is a good start. And promise yourself that in
that time you will let yourself be as wild and creative and impractical as you
like! Then allow your mind to wander freely, accepting, exploring and playing
with EVERY idea that comes up. Personally I like to get a big sheet of paper
and put my question in the middle, then write down whatever comes to mind all
over the sheet (like a spider diagram). You can use different coloured pens or
pencils, draw or paint your ideas, make them in clay...... I also
like to let my mind wander as I go for a walk, or even while doing ordinary
things like washing up. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All of these things help you to
access and encourage the creative side of your brain. Once you get away from
the need for things to be logical, to make sense, you will be surprised what
comes up. If at any stage your logical
brain wants to get involved, promise it that it will have time later to make
these ideas practical, and then gently but firmly put it to one side. Set aside
a different time to look at practicalities; I would recommend having a gap
between the two activities. It is good go off and do something different in
between, or to “sleep on it”, to allow your unconscious mind to process what
you have done before involving your logical conscious mind.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For further tips on answering the
question “What do you want?” see my previous blog <a href="http://hilaryallenlightningprocess.blogspot.co.uk/2016/10/what-do-you-want.html">"What do you want?"</a></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-39478912806382196382017-01-06T10:09:00.000-08:002017-01-06T10:09:02.362-08:00A FREE opportunity to get help with resolving addictions<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you know anybody who is struggling
with addictions and really wants to find a way out? Or maybe you recognise that
this is you? At this time of year, with a new year starting and resolutions
made or already broken, we often identify big changes that we want to make in
our lives, but we may not have a clue how to do that successfully. We don’t
always have effective tools: after all, if all you have in your hand is a
banana, it isn’t easy to put a flat pack together!</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">An amazing opportunity is available
over the next few months: to learn some powerfully effective tools to help you
make change for FREE, as part of a research project. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Phil Parker, the designer of the
Lightning Process, has also created a course called The Rediscovery Process (or
TRP), specifically aimed at people wanting to move on from addiction into a
full and rewarding life. Phil is currently leading research to establish the
effectiveness of TRP in the field of addiction, through the London Metropolitan
University. A preliminary trial has been completed and produced exciting results,
and the research has now moved on to the main trial. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Gary, who took part in the preliminary trial, said "I knew everything about drugs - but not how to stop - until now." Gary was a poly drug user, and is now abstinent, 6 months after TRP</span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Over the last two years I have been involved in this exciting project, as part of the Bristol and Bath Team. One of our previous TRP clients gave us permission to share her feedback about doing the
course:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“The TRP taught me to believe in
myself. When I came to the TRP course I was existing, I wouldn’t have minded if
I died. The very first day, I got a key, that I’ve got a choice. I can learn to
change the neurones in my head. I wanted to live again after your three day
course. Now I literally enjoy life.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I loved how you learned us, because
you accept me for who I am, treat me equal, gave me choices, and explained
things. You taught me how to think of things in a different way. I don’t get
myself wound up. The way I am communicating has changed. And a million more
things. Your way of working is the first time I have ever had that type of
input.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The follow ups were absolutely
amazing, I can see the magic happening in front of me. It’s been such a gift,
honestly.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We are currently recruiting people to
take part in this research from around the country, including the Bristol and
Bath area. While TRP works with any addictions,
the research project is focused specifically on drug and alcohol addictions. We
work with people at all stages and levels of recovery and drug use. So do pass
this on to anybody that you think might be interested, or get in touch with us
yourself if you would like to find out more:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="mailto:Research.trp@gmail.com"><span style="line-height: 115%;">Research.trp@gmail.com</span></a><span style="line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">020 7374 0233</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3051821699127647147.post-77087979755994123652016-12-23T08:13:00.001-08:002016-12-23T08:13:16.297-08:00Looking forward to a healthy 2017<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; color: #4e3d7d; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 15px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-size: large;">One of the things I love about this time of year is getting messages, emails or cards from clients saying how well they are doing or how much they are looking forward to a healthy happy future. So I thought I would share this one with you (with her permission!):</span></div>
<div style="background: rgb(255, 255, 255); border: 0px; color: #4e3d7d; font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 15px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-size: large;">“I am heading into 2017 feeling calm, strong, healthy and happy and that is thanks to all your support through the course and beyond.</span></div>
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<span class="im" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">So a massive thanks, with your support I have changed my life and I couldn’t have asked to achieve more in 2016!</span></span></div>
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<span class="im" style="background: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">Also I love the Bristol and Bath newsletters- the one about oxytocin was a great reminder of the importance of enjoying doing things together and being in those moments of laughter and connectivity with others.” G</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">So enjoy all your moments of laughter and connectivity, and Happy Christmas, Joyful Festivals, and have a great New Year!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Hilary</span></div>
Hilary Allenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07872275684299405626noreply@blogger.com0